Dear “And You Will Have Kids”:
We are moving again because of my husband’s job. The kids are not thrilled about starting school again as “the new kids” and I can’t say I blame them.
I’m not sure what to say and how to help them adjust. Any advice you have would be appreciated.
Move Weary Mom
Dear “Move Weary Mom”:
Moving can be difficult, especially when there are children involved. If your husband must move frequently with his job, it can certainly create hardships for the family. As a former military wife, I can relate to your weariness: I know of many families who moved every two years due to circumstances beyond their control. The children just got settled, started making new friends, and then the family moved.
There are some things you can do to help your children, even if they have been through the process before. I think the first thing to do is to try(it’s hard I know) to be positive or at least portray a positive attitude to them. If the children see your discouragement, it will affect them. If the many moves has really affected them, it may be time to have a family meeting to discuss how these moves are negatively impacting your family with your husband.
If you can, it would be best to move and get settled before school starts. If you are a military family, the military should have some resources which you can tap into to help the move go smoothly. If your husband works for a civilian company, check to see if they have any resources for families. Some companies do offer certain benefits which can help your family adjust to a move which may include counseling.
You will have to enroll your children in school before the start of the school year. While you are enrolling them, check to see if your children’s schools offer an orientation before school starts. If they don’t, you may want to consider making an appointment for your children to tour the school and meet their teachers. This should help your children to adjust. If the school has an orientation session, your children should be able to meet their teachers and also some of their classmates.
Encourage your children to continue their prior relationships. Keeping in touch with “old” friends and neighbors will help give them some stability as they begin to form “new” friendships in their new community.